beware of sinking hearts, they might be eaten

my stomach is beating like a heart. i wonder if my heart has sunk into my stomach, and is causing it to pulse. besides this queer feeling of my stomach beating like a heart, which is bad enough, it would be awful for my heart to become lodged in my stomach because it'd be vulnerable to all the other things in there. it'd be buffeted by the ball of bubble gum i have swallowed that people told me not to swallow because it never would digest but rather, lie in wait for the day it could pinball against my heart; (the people who nagged never knew that part).

my heart is not as strong as a pinball of bubble gum or cast iron like my stomach. it would not withstand digestive fluids: bile, and acid, and other unnameable things would corrode it away. i think now i understand this is what it means to eat one's heart out. i didn't know it all started with your stomach beating like a heart. i thought it was just a metaphor, or a reference to a stephen crane poem i adore.

the expression makes sense to me now though i have no idea if what i'm telling you is true. i certainly didn't know it'd start with your stomach beating like a heart. i think now i do.